Keeping up with ‘The Joneses’

Is that next purchase going to make you happy?  Maybe it’s a job or degree your working so hard for that you believe will take you to the next level.  This is our challenge on Day 25.

Unattainable Ladder

What we have started to describe for you is the ladder that so many are trying to climb, but will never reach the top.  The reason is there is no top.  There is always one more thing.  The sooner you can realize this life principle, you can begin reaching around to those who are important in your life.  Stop reaching up towards the unattainable that would bring you a fleeting, empty happiness for a passing moment.  Realize we only have a short time with certain people in this world and we are given grace to make the most of it.  Cherish the gift of friends and family.  

Unconditional Love

When you can stop focusing upward and start focusing inward and outward to those around you,  you will find a gift greater than you ever imagined.  Your Higher Power has more love and forgiveness than you could count. 

For those of you who are goal oriented and still need something to work toward, think about the place you were one year ago today.  How could I grow as a person, in this new direction, to be a better inward and outward?  Never compare your self with others; that is keeping up with the Joneses.  Surround yourself with others who share these goals of putting of putting people first and you will not believe how your outlook can change.

I would like to end with this quote from Lloyd Alexander:

Every man is a hero if he strives more for others than for himself alone.

Dan Davis is a licensed professional counselor in the Commonwealth of Kentucky. He is available for speaking and training of groups, schools, and businesses. Follow him on Twitter at @dand78

The devotional 45 days of Recovery in the Old Testament is available at:
http://www.amazon.com/45-days-Recovery-Old-Testament/dp/1470046253

The Lord is my Shepherd

Lost in confusion and doubt?  There is hope and healing from the Shepherd of our souls.  This is our focus on Day 24.

He guides

The title of today’s blog is taken from the 23rd Psalm that many are familiar with due to its use for comfort at funerals.  It is not limited to that instance alone.  Just as a Shepherd guides his sheep to safety, so the Lord wishes to watch over the fold of His children.  This is similar to the dynamic of coming to believe in a power that is greater in step work.  It is not for a controlling purpose, but so that Higher Power can guide you in the path that leads to life and freedom from bondage.

He provides

The second part of Psalm 23:1 states

I shall not want

The Shepherd wishes to not only guide, but also provide you with your needs.  You may not have very many material possessions and that’s okay.  Give your needs over to the Lord.  You will be surprised how they can be met.  Work on building your social support and network so that others can help you as well.  God blesses those that bless others. 

I would like to close today with a verse from the 23rd Psalm:

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the Lord for ever.

Dan Davis is a licensed professional counselor in the Commonwealth of Kentucky. He is available for speaking and training of groups, schools, and businesses. Follow him on Twitter at @dand78

If you need help from an addiction or have friends or family that need support, call (502) 491-3799.

The devotional 45 days of Recovery in the Old Testament is available at:
http://www.amazon.com/45-days-Recovery-Old-Testament/dp/1470046253

You are not alone

When all seems lost, there is hope and healing for the hurt of depression.  Take heart, you are not alone in this fight.  This is our challenge of Day 23.

Get on your feet

The sadness and desire to seclude yourself in this time will only make your situation worse.  Little by little, find what you can do to get out of your bedroom (or off your couch) and start to make changes.  Are there reminders in your living space that make your depression worse? (such as belongings from someone who no longer resides with you)  You don’t have to throw it all away, but why not box up things that trigger depression so you don’t have to confront them every day.

If you have not had a physical from your medical doctor recently, that is highly recommended.  There are many physical causes of depression such as a thyroid disorder.  Tell your doctor about your depression.  You do not have to take anti-depressants, but a medical professional can tell you the pros and cons of that class of meditation if you are a candidate.  The choice is up to you.

Get up and make it happen

One of the best depression fighting tools that science has confirmed to us is exercise.  The chemicals your body releases during exercise are natural depression fighters.  Most people fighting depression find this hard to hear.  My advice is start where you are today.  Park farther away from your destination, walk the steps a couple of times, try stretching while seated, all of these can get you moving in the right direction.  Do something active everyday, even if it seems small.

Get on your knees

Prayer, meditation, or the practice of mindfulness are powerful tools in the fight against depression.  These may be practiced in the privacy of your personal space.  A counselor can help you learn more about the practice of mindfulness if you desire to learn about that  coping skill. 

Get on safely

Because depression can lead to suicide, it is important we review staying safe.  If you have thoughts of suicide you should call 911 or go to you local hospital emergency department.  In the U.S., we have a resource called
1 800 273 TALK.  They are always available for anyone at risk of hurting themselves.

I would like to close today with some wisdom from the Old Testament (Deuteronomy 31:6)

Be strong and of a good courage, fear not, nor be afraid of them: for the LORD your God, he it is that does go with you; he will not fail you, nor forsake you.

Dan Davis is a licensed professional counselor in the Commonwealth of Kentucky. He is available for speaking and training of groups, schools, and businesses. Follow him on Twitter at @dand78

The devotional 45 days of Recovery in the Old Testament is available at:
http://www.amazon.com/45-days-Recovery-Old-Testament/dp/1470046253

Building up with words

Your words have the power to build up or destroy.  Choose wisely the way you empower others or tear them down.  This is the wisdom of Day 22.

Moving Forward

Our words can do so much more than we believe.  Consider this quote from John Maxwell:

A word of encouragement from a teacher to a child can change a life. A word of encouragement from a spouse can save a marriage. A word of encouragement from a leader can inspire a person to reach her potential.

To move forward to the next phase in our life, we must grasp the positive, encouraging words words that we receive.  We then must believe that their is a positive plan for our lives.  This does not mean that all your bad days are gone and all your difficulties are over.  It does mean that you can choose how you will view all of your days, both good and bad.  We have the decision to choose our outlook.  If you can, pick joy.  Joy overflows in our hearts and spills out into the lives of those around us. 

Moving Inward

As we choose to find our outlook, we can choose the words that come out of us.  Put away gossip, lies, and negativity.  It will only bring you down.  Make the choice to let uplifting words come forth from your lips.  You will not regret that decision!

Dan Davis is a licensed professional counselor in the Commonwealth of Kentucky. He is available for speaking and training of groups, schools, and businesses. Follow him on Twitter at @dand78

The devotional 45 days of Recovery in the Old Testament is available at:
http://www.amazon.com/45-days-Recovery-Old-Testament/dp/1470046253

Smart Fresh Start

You deserve a fresh start.  Open the door to a new beginning and give yourself an opportunity that you need to reset.  This is our focus on Day 21. 

A Virtual Start

The first step to take can be a technological one.  Changing phone numbers, email, and social media accounts can give you a virtual fresh start.  Once you have changed these accounts, be careful who you allow access to the new numbers or usernames.  Think about who you are following or friending on social media.  Will this person help me move forward in the new direction I have worked so hard to obtain?

A Physical Start

There are times when packing everything up and moving can be a possible goal.  Sometimes leaving your city and state are even needed.  This is not recommended for every situation.  Behavior change needs to occur where you are now.  If you are unable to resolve issues here, there is a chance you might be packing your problems in a moving box and opening them in your new location.  The grass is greener where you water it. 

With all of that being said, I have worked with individuals who had created very difficult situations for themselves in their city of residence.  Working with their family to find places across the country where they could start over was necessary. 

I will leave you with a quote about getting started on your new beginning:

Take the first step in faith. You don’t have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step. -Martin Luther King, Jr.

Dan Davis is a licensed professional counselor in the Commonwealth of Kentucky. He is available for speaking and training of groups, schools, and businesses. Follow him on Twitter at @dand78

The devotional 45 days of Recovery in the Old Testament is available at:
http://www.amazon.com/45-days-Recovery-Old-Testament/dp/1470046253

Support Report

You are not alone in this. 

You have more support than you might imagine.  This is our focus on Day 20.

Individual Support

A wise older Social Worker I am a colleague of would pass out a tent drawing to every new client that she would agree to work with.  She would then instruct Who’s under your tent? meaning who can you list as persons for support on this drawing. 

It may sound a little different, but before you left my Social Worker friend’s office, you had a list of minimum five people listed with home and cell numbers.  What a great tool!  Now you may say in our age of technology that a paper list of phone numbers is out of date.  Well let me tell you this, when you in a crisis, the last thing you need to worry about is where you put someone in your phone’s contact list.  Even worse, what if your battery is dead.  My advice to you is to get that list of minimum 5 people you can call and write it down. 

Tent drawing optional.

Group Support

Nothing can replace the transformational power of participating in the group process.  Whether you attend 12 step, SMART, Women for Sobreity, Celebrate Recovery, a therapy group, or a mutual support group, attend it and attend frequently.  We grow in groups in ways that we cannot in solitude.  Many find support in spiritual fellowship such as attending church.  If that helps and supports, continue attending.  Where ever you find it, don’t neglect the fact that we were created to live in community with others.  The fellowship we receive lifts our spirit in ways we can not reach while alone.

Reach out to those around you to build a network of support.  Who knows who will end up under you tent?

Dan Davis is available for speaking and training of groups, schools, and businesses. Follow him on Twitter at @dand78

The devotional 45 days of Recovery in the Old Testament is available at:
http://www.amazon.com/45-days-Recovery-Old-Testament/dp/1470046253

Access your Success

Put failure in the past.  Today is the day to move forward and reach for something you may have been afraid to have in your life: success.  This is our focus on Day 19.

Put the past in the past

Before you can reach forward for God’s best plan for you, there must be a willingness to put past failures, hurts, and grudges in the past where they belong.  If you keep them here in the present, you will never reach the future you were intended to have.  Let’s make a list: everything that you haven’t been able to let go of; do a fearless, searching inventory.  After you make your list I want you to do two things:

1.  Turn over every hurt over to your Higher Power, asking for the strength to move forward.

2.  Take the list and destroy it. (shred it, rip it, if you burn it take precautions like going outside and having an extinguisher on hand)

Put your eyes on the future

Now that the obstacles of the past are out of the way, start focusing on your future.  Robert Schuller said:

“What would you attempt to do if you knew you would not fail?”

God has a plan for you and that plan is one of success.  Let me be clear, I believe success looks different for everyone.  During my time working in Appalachia, I learned that some of the happiest people I met had little material possessions.  Success is finding that God-given gift inside of you and using it the way you were created to implement it.  Whether you’re a CEO or a cement mixer,  both are equally valued in the Kingdom.

Are you ready?  Success is in your reach.  Go seek it out today!

Dan Davis is a licensed professional counselor in the Commonwealth of Kentucky. He is available for speaking and training of groups, schools, and businesses. Follow him on Twitter at @dand78

The devotional 45 days of Recovery in the Old Testament is available at:
http://www.amazon.com/45-days-Recovery-Old-Testament/dp/1470046253

Our Shelter Forever

In the winds and storms that life bring, having a shelter secure can give you a peace that you will only find in one place.   This is our focus on Day 18.

Firm Foundation

The shelter that we spoke about earlier may have sounded like a literal refuge from harm.  While the concept of safety maybe true, the shelter we find in God’s love is greater than any human fortress we could fathom.  Although we may still experience earthly consequences for the actions we have made, God has promised to shelter His children in His arms.  That is promise I want to be apart of!

Found Location

While this promise of God, to be sheltered by Him, is one of great value, it does come with a decision.  I realize that many reading may struggle with the concept of Higher Power, and it is okay by me for you to take your time with such a big concept.  By calling yourself a child of God, you can accept that promise today and take shelter in His arms.  God’s love is here for everyone today. 

Dan Davis is a licensed professional counselor in the Commonwealth of Kentucky. He is available for speaking and training of groups, schools, and businesses. Follow him on Twitter at @dand78

The devotional 45 days of Recovery in the Old Testament is available at:
http://www.amazon.com/45-days-Recovery-Old-Testament/dp/1470046253

The Road to Restoration

Sitting alone in a jail cell, detox unit, or hospital bed, these are places where thought about restoration are needed.  The power of restoring the soul is available in those places, but it is also available on Monday morning at 9AM.  Restoration will be our focus on Day 17.

I once was lost

The author of the Psalms uses the term sick at heart when describing his need for restoration.  Changing our behavior so that we follow after our spiritual path restores us to place of peace.  We have discussed some spiritual practices such as gratitude,  but there other important practices still to learn that will help in this area.  As you grow in your spiritual walk, you will find that it can be easy to get off the path you planned to be on.  This is why it is so important to have a fellowship of others around you.   Other people with the same ideals can bring the best out in us.  If you have not found a fellowship yet, consider it today.

We need others.

I still get lost

Even with our best intention, life is not perfect.  You are not perfect.  Mistakes will happen.  It is important to be able to get yourself back up and be able to move on.  Rainy days are coming,  so plan, bring an umbrella!

Dan Davis is a licensed professional counselor in the Commonwealth of Kentucky. He is available for speaking and training of groups, schools, and businesses. Follow him on Twitter at @dand78

The devotional 45 days of Recovery in the Old Testament is available at:
http://www.amazon.com/45-days-Recovery-Old-Testament/dp/1470046253

Your Right Answer to Anger

You feel your pupils dilate, hands sweat, and heart rate increases.  These are just a few of the bodily signs of anger.  Day 16 we will explore the physical and spiritual effects of anger. 

An Old Testament formula

Proverbs 15:1 states:

A soft answer turns away wrath,
But a harsh word stirs up anger.

This formula is the basics for modern day de-escalation.  When you are angry, seek calming stimuli.  If not, you will become even angrier.  Right now while you are not upset,  decide what you could do to calm yourself in difficult times.   Maybe you write the calming list down, which gives you a plan.  This might sound  like over planning to some, but for those who have broken windows or lamps in anger, a plan sounds pretty good.  Every one’s plan will be different.  While one person might need to go for a run and get all that adrenaline out; another might be reflective and want to write every feeling in a journal.  There is no wrong answer. Always include turning over the angry stimuli to your Higher Power in your plan.

Make a plan for anger.  This takes surprise away when it comes.

H.A.L.T.

The acronym HALT is a recovery acronym that is a reminder to not let yourself get too hungry, angry, lonely, or tired to were you would relapse.  It is easy to remember the letters, but not always easy to followed.  We will look at the rest of the acronym on another day.

Dan Davis is a licensed professional counselor in the Commonwealth of Kentucky. He is available for speaking and training of groups, schools, and businesses. Follow him on Twitter at @dand78

The devotional 45-days-Recovery-Old-Testament is available at:
http://www.amazon.com/45-days-Recovery-Old-Testament/dp/1470046253